Aoi High
by YaoiPhox
Summary: HIDAKUZU, not KakuHida. Don't like, don't read. Smut. AU.  Kakuzu has moved to a new, very strange school. Mr. Fukyuu isn't like most teachers he's had. Not at all. Other pairings  no official seme/uke, just couples hinted  KisaIta, SasoDei, MadaZet.


WARNING! THIS HAS A HIDAKUZU PAIRING!

IF YOU ARE JUST GONNA FLAME, LEAVE NOW, BIOTCHES.

At least Kakuzu is not extremely Uke... In my opinion...

I hope you all enjoy reading it regardless. If it wasn't for the HidaKuzu, more people might have read this and I realize this. It is I, the authoress, that wished to write this. I choose what happens, not you. This was for my own enjoyment and if others enjoy it too, I'll be glad that I you enjoyed it.

Lol... that makes no sense... xD Regardless, Have fun reading... or click the back button ASAP.

* * *

Kakuzu stood before his new high school, frowning at the busted old sign that read; 'aoi High'. He knew his Japanese fairly well since he had taken a semester at his old school and wondered why a little school in the desert was named blue. There was no color whatsoever to the rundown building, unlike his high school back in the lush Taki. He was nineteen so he could have stayed there but the cost of living in Taki was far more expensive than living in Suna, population; low.

The hallways were not too crowded yet he managed to bump into a large male. He apologized and looked up at the guy, caught off guard by the blue skin. The other had apologized before him and was still apologizing. Then the boy straightened up as if he realized something.

"Are you the new kid?" He blinked.

"I guess so." Kakuzu replied in a bored monotone. He had only ever been to two schools including this one and was not used to being the new kid... except for after that one incident.

"My name's Kisame Hoshigaki. What about your name?" He held out his hand.

"Kakuzu Shisan." He returned gruffly, shaking the offered hand; they both had a fairly strong grip given they both towered over the other students together.

"I bet you need some friends." Kisame grinned, revealing sharp teeth. It did not surprise the masked male.

"I don't really care either way." He shrugged; he had never been very social and he blamed that on his intimidating size.

"Well, you're sure to fit in. There's a lot of outcasts in this school. Not many people around either so clicks are tight, ya know?"

He went inside the gymnasium and over to the bleachers where two other boys sat. There was a skinny redhead with pale skin—Kakuzu guessed he was around fourteen. The other looked older than himself and had green hair. He, like Kisame, had weird skin; half black, half white as in pure black and pure white, split down the middle. They both looked up when the pair arrived.

"New kid." Kisame explained, earning looks that showed they could tell.

"Name's Sasori. I like puppets and—despite what the brat says—art is eternal." He shook his hand; his was hard... like wood.

"We are Zetsu." The other stepped up but did not offer his hand. "We like plants. I am a vegetarian. **I like human flesh.**" Kakuzu quirked a brow but before he could ask, Kisame was revealing more about himself.

"I love anything to do with the ocean, my inherited sword, and my weasel." He practically purred the last bit, making the other two roll their eyes.

"Kakuzu Shisan. I live for money."

Then, the bell rang. Kisame asked for his schedule, offering to show him around. However Zetsu protested, claiming he was in charge of showing kids around. It seemed he took it seriously too since he did not back down. Kisame sighed in defeat and handed Kakuzu's schedule over to Zetsu. He shooed them away to their class and took Kakuzu's arm, leading him to the basement. Kakuzu felt a chill and he doubted it was from the cold.

"Psych class is down here." Zetsu explained, "**We should know since we help down here.**"

"Student teacher?" Kakuzu guessed.

"Yeah. **Shame the only psych teach is Mr. Fukyuu.**" He sighed, arriving at a door with scratches on it.

"'Mr.' who?" Kakuzu blinked.

"Fuck you, bitch. Shouldn't you be in your own fucking room?" A man shouted from inside the moment the door opened.

"I'm going, skank." A man with long blond hair snapped at a man with slicked back gray hair.

"Good." He huffed, grinning when he saw Zetsu. "'Bout fucking time, prick. Who the hell is this bastard?" He looked at Kakuzu whom was shocked by the man's behavior.

"Your new student, Mr. Fukyuu."

"Oh... shit... really?" He looked around at his class... of eleven. "Er... 'guess he could sit in front of my desk..."

Kakuzu noticed that the only seats opened were ones at the front, near the board and desk. He shrugged and took his seat, ignoring the murmurs from the other students. The teacher closed the door with an ominous click. The room was silent save the sound of him crossing the floor and arriving at the board. He picked up a piece of chalk and Kakuzu finally noticed the black board. He was surprised at the condition it was in. There were numerous scratches and some of them matched the symbol dangling around his neck and scratched in the classroom door.

"Okay little shits, welcome back to Economics. Boring ass shit but fuck if I care." He wrote 'Economics' on the board. "Hope you had a shitty break 'cause it might be the last you ever have."

"Mr. Fukyuu..." One of the girls piped, "I think we're missing a few people..."

"Hm? I know. Little shits probably chickened out. Gives me less work though." He shrugged. "Though with this freaky bastard," He pointed to Zetsu whom was sitting in a desk right next to his. "I won't have to do anything."

"**Lazy asshole.** Be nice." Zetsu scolded himself.

"Nah. You just shut the fuck up whitey." The teacher grinned. "Blacky's cooler."

"**Thank you, Mr. Fukyuu.**" He dipped his head, grinning somewhat insanely.

"Any-fuckin'-ways." The man rolled his shoulders back. "Let's get to work. Since I don't give two shits about the economy, you're reading straight from your books." He wrote page numbers on the board. "Then you'll answer any and all questions you come across." He turned back around. "You'll be turning in the report mentioned on this page," He jabbed his finger at a number, "next week."

Kakuzu watched other students pull out their textbooks and looked over to his teacher. He was on the phone, glancing at Zetsu every few seconds. He nodded and then hung up, whispering something to his student teacher. Zetsu looked excited and yet worried, leaving the room. Mr. Fukyuu locked the door behind him again and approached Kakuzu's desk.

"Alright, fresh shit. Time to get you a book." He turned and went to a cabinet, returning moments later with a slightly bloodied textbook. "Here."

Kakuzu took the book, only wondering about the bloodstain for a moment. He flipped to the pages and pulled out a notebook. No wonder it was so cheap in this area; the teachers sucked, the materials were even worse. He quickly began jotting down notes. The teacher sat at his desk, observing Kakuzu as he frowned, looking closer at the book. He glanced from his notebook to the tesxt book for a moment and then pulled out a calculator. He tilted his head, confused; he was the only one with the calculator.

He stood up and hovered over the teen's shoulder. It looked like he was working on a personal budget. He frowned since the kid was still in high school then considered it was a personal finance assignment. Yet this was his first class on the first day, he should not have homework. The brown-haired teen showed signs that the teacher's hovering was getting on his nerves. Sure enough, the teen looked up, glaring at him with his red and green eyes.

"Can I help you, sir?" He grumbled. Again with the murmurs and gasps.

"What the hell are you doing?" He asked casually.

"None of your business." Kakuzu looked back at his papers, looking up again when a pale hand slapped down on them.

"You sure got some attitude, little shithead."

"You're the 'little' one." Kakuzu stood to up, looking down at his teacher. He took satisfaction in the man's surprised expression.

"Damn, you're big." He whispered then glowered at the nineteen year old. "Did you finish the assignment?"

"Yeah. Though there were a few mistakes. The book is outdated." He scoffed, glaring at the teacher. "You're not a very good teacher."

SLAP!

Kakuzu was shocked; the teacher had just slapped him across the face. He was still smirking at his student when he turned to the chalk board. He placed his nails to the board and Kakuzu noticed all of the students wincing, covering their ears. Then, he heard it—nails on a chalkboard. Literally.

"Now then, Kakuzu, perhaps you should go ahead and stay after school and tell me exactly how I could be a better teacher." His eyes narrowed briefly and then the door opened.

"Mr. Fukyuu, **the bell rang a few minutes ago.**" He informed him, pocketing the key.

"Shit! Jashin damnit! I wish they would fixed that fucking bell." He glared up behind his desk at a dented bell.

"**Well,** maybe if you hadn't thrown a desk at it-"

"It interrupted my fucking prayer!" He snapped cutting off Zetsu.

"Oi, prick." Zetsu blinked with the teacher, both turning to Kakuzu. "Shouldn't you be releasing us now?"

Zetsu's jaw was open in shock. No one would ever think of telling that teacher off. He then noticed a red mark on his cheek. He watched the psych teacher approach the teen. They glared at each other for a moment and then he turned his violent eyes on the door.

"Zetsu unlocked the door. But if you avoid that punishment we spoke of..."

He trailed, making it seem as though the threat had been made. Kakuzu guessed that the idiot just could not think of what he would do to him. Kakuzu scowled under his scarf, slinging his bag over his shoulder. He brushed past his teacher, bumping him on purpose. He could feel the deathly glare on him long after he had made it up the stairs.

–

During the seventh period of Kakuzu's first day, he had lunch. He looked at his schedule for his class and was surprised to find it was the library. He stepped inside, startled when he saw Kisame and Sasori in there, sitting at a table. They appeared bored and jumped when Kakuzu sat at their table. He had been receiving those looks all day, it seemed. He finally had someone that might answer him.

"What?" He had not meant to growl, honestly.

"Er... Zetsu told us about this morning." Kisame managed.

"You actually talked back to Mr. Fukyuu." Kisame then interrupted Sasori with, "ARE YOU SUICIDAL?"

A book then landed smack in his blue face. Sasori and Kakuzu jumped, turning as a black-haired male with a somewhat sickly appearance entered. He had two wrinkles on his face which Kakuzu bet was due to stress. He approached Kisame slowly and his eyes looked red.

"Kisame. How many times must I tell you to keep quiet in my library?" His voice was like velvet yet it gave Kakuzu and Sasori the chills.

"Sorry, Itachi-san." Kisame apologized a few times until the man cut him off.

"Kisame, shut up."

"Right, sor-"

"Kisame."

"Shutting up."

"Mr. Uchiha, we have a new kid." Sasori motioned to Kakuzu.

"Hn." He glanced at Kakuzu and then Kisame.

"Kakuzu Shisan. He lives for money." He recited.

"Hn." Itachi smiled slightly—Kakuzu assumed it was a smile anyways.

"He said 'Welcome to English'." Kisame translated with his lopsided grin. "'And try to steer clear of Mr. Fukyuu.'"

"Little late for that one, Mr. Uchiha." Sasori sneered. "Didn't you hear about it from Zetsu yet?"

"No."

He held up a finger and drifted over to a white board. He began to write directions on a board. An essay on a book of their choosing. Points would depend on the book's complexity level and, of course, how the essay was written. It was due next week. There were twenty-five students and twelve computers. Some of the students had, apparently, chosen their books over the break before Kakuzu came so they rushed to the computers to begin their essays.

"I'm gonna go get a book." Kakuzu stood, only to be stopped by Itachi.

"No need just yet. You have a week." He sat down with his students. "So what happened this morning?"

"Er... not much I guess. I said he wasn't a good teacher, he slapped me across the face, and he said he wants me to stay after school so I can tell him how to be a better teacher." He shrugged.

"He... slapped you?" Itachi blinked.

"Yeah." Kakuzu frowned, recalling the sting.

"Hey, Itachi-san, is Hidan-san gay?" Kisame earned a cold glare from Itachi and an odd one from Sasori.

"Kisame-"

"Sorry! I forgot... Dei—I mean Katsu-san," He corrected after receiving a glare from Sasori now. "Uses his first name all the time so..."

"That's 'cause they used to date." Sasori shrugged. Kakuzu seemed to have been forgotten. "It's a habit..."

"Somebody's jealous~" Kisame smirked, poking Sasori's cheek.

"Fuck you, Kisame."

"Hn." Itachi growled at the redhead.

"He said not to curse." Kisame laughed. "Only Mr. Fukyuu is allowed to curse."

"Fine, Fukyuu." Sasori smirked.

The bell rang and it was time for them to go to lunch. Kakuzu was confused when Kisame followed Itachi down the hall to a room near the cafeteria rather than follow Sasori and himself into the lunch line. Sasori was grumbling under his breath about something and Kakuzu nudged him forward as he was holding up the line. However, Kakuzu was stronger than the skinny shrimp whom ended up bumping into that blond Kakuzu had seen yelling at Mr. Fukyuu.

"There you are, Sasori-danna." The blond grinned. "I thought you'd be as impatiently waiting for me, hm... not the other way around."

"Tch... brat." Sasori continued grumbling under his breath.

They went through the line and got their food. The blond got a decent meal—probably the most decent in the options offered. Sasori got nothing. Kakuzu had gotten a free cheese sandwich. They followed him to a table near what Kakuzu read was the Teacher's Lounge where Itachi and Kisame had gone. He sat up straighter when the door opened then slumped when he saw Zetsu coming out. However, there was another familiar face behind the student teacher—his 'mentor', Mr. Fukyuu.

"Fukyuu..." Kakuzu grumbled, earning his redheaded friend's attention.

"Don't worry, maybe he won't come-"

"Deidara-chan!"

"Over..."

Sasori now shared Kakuzu's mood as the teacher came over to their table, plopping down besides Deidara. Zetsu took his seat across from the nineteen year old. Mr. Fukyuu grinned at the blond, waiting for a response. He got none and began to complain.

"Come on, Dei-chan~, why won't you say anything."

"As I recall, you told him to fuck off and he called you a skank. He's probably still upset by that, baka-sensei." Kakuzu knew these guys knew Japanese given they used honorifics.

"You!" The man snapped, glaring at the boy. "Mind your own Jashin-damn business."

"'Jashin'..." Kakuzu mused, "There's that word again. What's it mean?" He heard a pen drop across the cafeteria.

"YOU MOTHER FUCKING HEATHEN!" Kakuzu was startled when the man lunged.

"Hidan!" Deidara protested, getting to his feet. "Stop, hm. You can't attack the students again, hm!"

Zetsu was faster and reached Hidan, grabbing his arm as he pulled it back in order to sock him in the face. He growled, looking back at Zetsu's look but then got up, brushing himself off. He excused himself to the teacher's lounge with the student teacher close on his heels. Deidara sighed, shaking his head before helping Kakuzu to his feet.

"Sorry about him, hm. He has a short temper..." He apologized.

"You shouldn't have to apologize, brat. The idiot's got nothing to do with you." Sasori was a little pink in the face, much to Kakuzu's confusion.

"Hm... you're right." Deidara sighed again and sat down across from the redhead. "What would you like to eat, danna?"

"Why do you call him your master?" Kakuzu inquired, forcing himself to eat his sandwich.

"Oh... Um..." Deidara frowned, "It's complicated, hm..."

"I see..." Kakuzu glanced at his friend but he was way to focused on the fries he had taken from Deidara's plate.

"So... are you Kakuzu? Zetsu told Sasori told me that the new kid had managed to ruffle Hidan's fur the wrong way real fast, hm." Deidara eyed the skinny yet muscular male.

"It's not my fault he's teaching a class he knows nothing about." Kakuzu grumbled in his defence.

"It's not his fault we can't afford a teacher that knows something about that class, hm. At least he knows his psychology and sociology." Deidara defended the teacher.

"Don't forget he knows his foods too." Sasori smirked.

"Oh... I tell you too much, danna." Deidara frowned then looked at his watch. "Damn... I have to get back to my class, hm. I left the students with some sharp tools."

"Lousy teaching." Sasori teased, getting a smile from Deidara.

"See you later, danna."

"Wait... he's a teacher?"

"Yep. The art teacher." Sasori said, shoving what was left on the teacher's tray over to Kakuzu. "You should eat more than cheese and bread like some lowlife vermin."

"... Er. Thanks, I think."

–

At the end of the day, Kakuzu had headed for Hidan's class. He stopped when he saw Zetsu standing outside the room with Kisame and Sasori. They waved Kakuzu over and told him he would have to wait before disturbing Mr. Fukyuu. When Sasori's phone rang, however, he took off with Kisame and the green-haired plant lover, saying they had to get to an after school meeting. Kakuzu shrugged and decided to disregard their warning. He entered the class without hesitation.

He stopped cold. Hidan Fukyuu was laying in a corner of the room, covered in blood. Kakuzu gulped and dared to take a step closer. A rusted pipe had stabbed through the man's chest and on the ground, his necklace's symbol was drawn in blood. He saw that his eyes were wide open but blank. He was dead. Kakuzu struggled to keep his cool and backed out of the room. He stumbled, making a desk topple over. He ran, but not before a certain immortal caught a glimpse of him.

–

The next morning, Kakuzu met the others, deprived of his sleep. Every time he closed his eyes he would see his Economics teacher's empty eyes staring at him. Zetsu quirked an eye at his new friend's behavior and figured he had ignored their warning. So, he decided to reassure Kakuzu... or at least the white side had it in mind.

"**We'll be teaching you this morning, Kakuzu.**" He grinned maliciously at Kakuzu's panicked expression.

"Oh... did Mr. Fukyuu get hammered again last night?" Sasori frowned but he secretly wished that he had. He hated the man.

"**Dunno.**" Zetsu was cackling.

"Shut the fuck up, Zetsu. It's too early for this shit."

Kakuzu's heart jumped at the familiar voice and sure enough, his Economics teacher was standing there, perfectly fine. However, the look he was giving Kakuzu was an odd one. It was not so much anger as it was... interest? He ignored it though and turned away from Mr. Fukyuu. Clearly, he had lost his mind yesterday. Perhaps it was the heat he had not yet grown accustomed to. The bell rang and Sasori separated with Kisame close behind. Hidan said nothing, leader both of the younger males to the classroom.

When they entered, there were groans of disappointment which became confusion as they noticed the new, brave student at the teacher's side. However, Kakuzu had chosen to sat in a seat far away from the teacher this time. He just needed to relax, work on fixing the book's statistics. Hidan began class, writing an assignment on the board. He paused, a twitch going through his body.

The chalk dropped and then, his nail was drawing another symbol on the board. The kids, including Kakuzu, winced. He turned around and the kids became emerged in their books. Hidan frowned as he saw Kakuzu was not looking at him either. He plopped down in his chair, getting Zetsu's attention. He stopped playing with the mini flytrap he carried around and scooted his chair next to his.

"Something wrong, **Hidan**?" He inquired.

"That kid saw my ritual yesterday." He grumbled. "I thought I told you to keep him out."

"**I thought you liked freaking kids out**." He replied.

"Not _him_." He hissed. "I wanted to ask him more. Now he'll never answer my questions."

"**I don't see why it matters.**" He scoffed. "What kind of questions?"

"... I wanted to know more about this shitty class." He shrugged, earning a weird look from his student teacher. "What?"

"You **never gave two shits** about this class." He explained.

"No one's seemed to mind. I assumed they were fine with it." He mumbled.

"Why did you become a teacher?" The lighter side inquired.

"I dunno. That damn bitch got me a little interested, I guess." He admitted.

"Mr. Katsu?" Hidan nodded.

"'Sides, I like scaring the kids as much as I came to enjoy teaching them." He grinned.

"Uh-**huh**." Zetsu rolled his eyes.

"Of course..." He grinned. "You also helped. I thought your personality disorder was wicked sexy."

"Feeling a little weirded out." Zetsu scoot his chair back. "**Don't let the principal catch you saying that.**"

"You're the one that called me by my first name." Hidan retorted, grabbing a knife from his desk. "Now keep an eye on the kids. I forgot to do a ritual this morning."

Zetsu glanced at his watch every few minutes and then looked over at the teacher a little before it was time to leave. The idiot had passed out from blood loss. Blood that was dripping in his 'blood bucket'. He sighed and stood, getting the kids' attention. Kakuzu was staring at Hidan, much to his friend's worry. He cleared his throat and gave them a five minute early release. They cheered, save Kakuzu, and left the room. Kakuzu was surprised that all the noise had not woken Mr. Fukyuu.

He watched Zetsu glare at him before moving over to the desk. He leaned over him and pulled hair out of his paler-than-usual face. He looked back at Kakuzu, wondering why the brat had not left. He growled and then straightened up, whirling to face Kakuzu.

"**You were released, Kakuzu. Leave.**" Kakuzu simply sat there. "**Kaku-**"

"What's wrong with him?" He was on his feet, approaching the desk.

"**He's sleeping**." Zetsu intercepted.

"Bullshit." He glared.

"Mn... Zetsu... is it time for psychology intro yet?" Hidan slurred, blinking to try and clear his blurred vision.

"No. We released students early. **But the first one should be here soon.**" He sighed. "Kakuzu won't leave."

"Why the fuck no—oi, big shit, back up." He growled, shocked at how close the kid had gotten. "Now why are you still here. Zetsu released you."

"... Are you alright?" Kakuzu asked with eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, why?" He grinned.

"... Yesterday..."

"Ah. No biggie. I do that all the time." Hidan admitted.

"You immortal?" Kakuzu scoffed, not quite believing.

"Yep. Jashin-sama grants me immortality so long as I sacrifice and do my rituals."

"So he's your god." Kakuzu frowned.

"Yep."

"Another reason why you're a bad teacher."

Hidan's smile fell and Zetsu stepped back. Hidan lunged and Kakuzu sidestepped, casually strolling out of the classroom. Hidan growled, glaring at the door. Zetsu kept his distance and then watched him march back to his seat.

"That punk-ass bitch is gonna get it."

"Now, now."

"I could stand his insulting me. But when Jashin-sama is involved..."

–

Kakuzu sighed, flipping another page in his book. He was in Mr. Uchiha's class again, Sasori had not shown and Kisame was in a back room to the library with the teacher. Finally, the lunch bell rang and Kakuzu closed his book, gathering his things. He looked at the back room, wondering why Kisame and Itachi still had not come out. He shrugged and then made his way over, opening the door.

He dropped his books in supreme shock. Itachi was sitting on Kisame's lap, their lips locked together. Kakuzu blinked, thinking he was imagining things. However they were still kissing, Kisame's hands starting to go up the teacher's shirt. Kakuzu cleared his throat and the pair froze. Itachi jumped off his lap, glaring at Kakuzu with red eyes. Kisame was blushing and opened his mouth as if to explain but then it closed and Kisame grabbed a pillow from the little bed they had been on.

"Kakuzu. Hasn't anyone told you to knock before entering?" Itachi asked in that cold tone.

"I-Itachi-san, m-maybe I could talk to him first?" Kisame asked, still trying to hide his embarrassment.

"Hn." He grumbled, leaving the room.

Kakuzu and Kisame winced when the door slammed behind him. Kisame exhaled slowly, beckoning his friend to the loveseat. He obeyed, mainly because he was still in shock.

"Listen, before you explode and decide to tell everyone, an affair between a student and teacher is perfectly normal at Yaoi High." Kisame soothed, earning Kakuzu's attention.

"'Yaoi' High?" He echoed.

"... Er yeah..." He then recalled the rundown sign. "Yaoi is a term for... well..."

"I know what it means." He was blushing now. "I thought it was just a typo..."

"Yep... This is a high school that traffics gay guys." He laughed at his friend's reaction. "Although it's not really trafficking since I can only stick with my Itachi. Just like how Sasori has to stick with his Mr. Katsu."

"Wait... Sasori too? What about that blond guy? Dei-" A blue hand was slapped over his mouth.

"You can't say their first name unless they're yours." Kisame explained.

"Eh?" Kakuzu was clearly confused.

"Okay, pay attention." He straightened up, ignoring the confused look his friend was giving. "At this High School, you can date one of your teachers. If you do, you get to call them by their first name. Once that happens, if someone else calls your teacher by their first name, you could get in trouble 'cause that's a sign you and that teacher... well... you know."

"I think I get the idea..." Kakuzu murmured. "Not everyone has to date a teacher though, right?"

"No, of course not. Not everyone here is gay." Kisame grinned. "And not every teacher has to date a student. Like Mr. Fukyuu... not that anyone would want to though."

"Why not?" Kisame's eyes went wide at his question.

"Do you or do you not have him as a teacher?" He exclaimed. "The guy's a loon. And a jerk."

"... I don't think that entirely... he just follows a cult and curses a lot... not to mention the death threats... but I give those too if someone pisses me off."

"... O-kay." Kisame stood up. "How about we get some lunch? Our treat since you had to see that." He blushed.

"Fine by me. I forgot to pack my lunch again."

"Why don't you just buy one?"

"Too expensive and this school doesn't do free lunch."

"You really do like money... no wonder Mr. Fukyuu hates you so much." Kakuzu paused; for some reason, it hurt to hear that.

"What's his issue with money?"

"It's against his religion to value money." He laughed then, "Yet it isn't against his religion to spill human blood."

"I noticed..." He grumbled, recalling yesterday's after school event.

"Ooo... we warned you not to go in there." Kisame laughed, knocking on the teacher lounge door.

"Hey Hoshigaki, hm." Deidara greeted, "What are you doing here, Kakuzu?"

"I-"

"Itachi-san, can we share with him? The frugal idiot won't pay for his own food." Kisame brushed past the art teacher upon seeing his lover, dragging Kakuzu inside with him.

"Yeah. He was eating a cheese sandwich yesterday." Sasori nodded.

Kakuzu was surprised to find his redhead friend here as well. It almost surprised him more when Deidara joined him on the loveseat and pulled the student onto his lap. Kakuzu figured they had already been informed about his knowledge on their relationship. Itachi was looking at him, waiting for him to join Kisame and himself on the couch. Kakuzu snapped his eyes away from the pair and joined the others. A large pile of food was in front of them. He knew why it was so big the moment Kisame began to pig out.

"Eat." Itachi demanded then added with a very small smile, "Or there will be nothing left."

Kakuzu obeyed, slipping a piece of meat under his mask. The food was the best he had tasted in a long time. He paid no attention when the lounge door opened again. Hidan and Zetsu stepped in, to deep in their conversation to notice Kakuzu at first.

"Hey Kakuzu, Kisame! Why don't you two have an eating contest?" Sasori suggested.

"Heh. You're on, Kakuzu." Kisame grinned, pulling away from his food.

"Don't I get a say?" He grumbled.

"**He's going to lose.**" Zetsu commented, startling Kakuzu. "Why?** The idiot won't remove that mask.**"

"Why the fuck not?" Hidan asked, glaring at his student.

"Because I don't have to, baka-sensei." Kakuzu drawled.

"Hn..."

"Itachi asked if you're suicidal." Kisame translated.

"No... well... maybe." Kakuzu shrugged, watching as Hidan got a bit angrier. "Not as much as baka-sensei."

"Er... Kakuzu..." Sasori piped from the loveseat, which was a safe distance from the couch.

"You bastard... are you trying to piss me off?" Hidan seethed.

"**Hidan.**" Zetsu touched the teacher's shoulder. "Madara will be upset if you attack another student..."

"Tch. Whatever. I'm going to class." He huffed, turning away from Kakuzu. "And little shit," He turned back around. "You're going to teach the class tomorrow morning."

"... What just happened?" Kisame blinked.

"Hn..." Itachi was staring at Kakuzu.

"Thanks for the food." The nineteen year old stood. "I should probably get going though. I promised my business teacher I'd help him with something."

"... He's a bit weird, hm." Deidara mused once he had left.

"Yeah. Is he gay, Kisame?" Sasori inquired.

"How the hell should I know?" Kisame whined.

"We'll have to ask him later..."

–

Kakuzu left his last business-related class of the day and started for the exit. However, he was stopped by Zetsu before he reached the doors. The plant lover pulled him aside and into a bathroom.

"What's up?" Kakuzu grumbled; he really did not want to walk when the desert was its hottest.

"If you fear for your life, **you should stay away from Hidan.**" Zetsu warned before ducking back out.

It was like he was gone in a flash. Kakuzu shrugged that off and thought about his warning. He wondered if Zetsu and Mr. Fukyuu were a couple given he had been using his first name and the whole warning. It sounded like he was jealous of Kakuzu yet he knew not why. After all, that teacher hated him and Kakuzu insulted him every time they met. However, Kisame had said no one was dating him.

Why would their relationship be secret? Kakuzu had reached his crummy apartment and a new question popped up. Why did he care?

–

The next morning, Kakuzu avoided Hidan like the plague. Hidan growled to himself as his student gathered his books. The teenager had not said anything. Had the kid finally decided to become like the others and fear him? It upset him since he had been looking forward to a good banter. He watched Zetsu from the corner of his eye. Perhaps he could go and speak to Kakuzu alone. He decided to go after lunch when Kakuzu was no where to be seen—not in the cafeteria nor the lounge.

"Zetsu. Teach the next class for me. I'll try and be back soon."

"But you love teaching this period." Zetsu blinked.

Hidan went to the principal's, waving to Pain as he passed the secretary. Madara was sitting at his desk and turned to the door when someone knocked. He welcomed them in eagerly after discovering it was Hidan.

"So, how is my Zetsu?" He cooed.

"Fine I guess." Hidan shrugged. "Hey, can you tell me where Kakuzu Shisan is?"

"Why?" The man smirked.

"Just need to ask him something." He shrugged.

"... He's in his business class." He replied. "He stays in there for the next two periods or so."

"Sarutobi's then?" Hidan frowned; he hated that teacher.

However he gave a curt nod and left, heading for the man's room. He did not bother to knock, barging into the classroom. Sarutobi was leaning over Kakuzu's shoulder, staring at his papers. Hidan twitched but resisted the urge to scratch something, striding over to them. Sarutobi looked up, eyes wide as he realized who was there.

"... You...?" He was very shocked. Kakuzu looked up and shared his surprise, "What do _you_ want?"

"I'd like to see that shit." He pointed to Kakuzu.

"Fukyuu." Kakuzu scoffed. "I'm in my favorite class. Can't it wait?"

"... No." He growled, grabbing Kakuzu's shoulder.

Mr. Sarutobi made to stop him but a glare from the psych teacher kept him quiet. Kakuzu protested the entire time he was dragged to the basement. Instead of going to the classroom, he went into another room across from the class. It was a comfortable looking place with a bed like the room Itachi and Kisame had been in. Kakuzu's heart beat increased as he realized this. However, Hidan had no intention of doing anything like _that_.

"Alright you mother fucking shit. Why have you been avoiding me today?" He snapped.

"... I don't see why you wouldn't want me to avoid you." He shrugged. "Everyone else does."

"But you weren't supposed to be like everyone else." He hissed, twitching which caused him to dig his nails into Kakuzu. The boy winced.

"Ow. What the fuck, prick?" He snapped, shaking the hand off. "What are you talking about?"

"I thought you would be the one." He growled quietly, weirding Kakuzu out further. "You actually talked back to me... you weren't like the other cowards. I guess that's just 'cause you didn't know me like they did though..."

"Erm..." Kakuzu fidgeted. "I'm not really afraid of you..."

Hidan's head snapped up. "What?"

"I mean, you're a bit violent but I don't think you'd kill me—at least not when there are witnesses." Kakuzu grew more uncomfortable under the magenta gaze. He liked that eye color on him; made him seem less threatening.

"That's right. Jashin-sama wouldn't approve if I got caught." He smirked, then worried he had frightened him again.

"Look, I'm not afraid of you. I just want to get back to my class." Kakuzu huffed.

"You... aren't afraid?" Hidan got an odd smile on his face.

"No. At least, not as afraid as would be of myself." This made Hidan stop his advancing.

"What do you mean?"

"It's nothing..." He replied, shaking his head.

"Hey kid, I can't understand you with that mask on. Speak up, damnit."

"I said, 'IT'S NOTHING.'" He repeated, brushing past the teacher. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Hidan watched him go, his heart racing. He cursed, grabbing his chest. This teenager was the first one he had ever met that had not feared him. Even his only boyfriend had feared him and chosen a heartless redhead over him. He sat at the foot of his bed and put his head in his hands. He had to get to know this kid. Even if it was the last thing he did.

–

The next morning, Hidan waited eagerly for Kakuzu to arrive. The teenager was with Kisame and Sasori whom had decided to accompany him to his class. Kakuzu was telling them what had happened the previous day.

"Holy shit... how could you _not _be afraid of the psycho?" Sasori gaped.

"He isn't a psycho. He's a psych teacher." Kakuzu sighed. "I look scarier than he acts and even then, I have a short temper too." He shrugged.

"What do you mean, 'I look scarier'?" Kisame frowned.

"I wear a mask and cloak in the desert for a reason, dumb asses." He rolled his eyes as they reached the room.

"Oh?"

Kisame and Sasori smirked evilly behind his back. The next thing he knew, Kisame had stolen his mask and tossed it to Sasori. The redhead had run ahead of them and Kakuzu felt his face, cursing. He ran after the redhead. Sasori jumped and scurried into the classroom. His stitches had been exposed and Kisame followed his friends into Mr. Fukyuu's class. Sasori was so occupied with trying to escape Kakuzu that he did not see the teacher until the collision. He fell back and Hidan turned, glaring at him. Sasori glared back.

"GOD-DAMNIT SASORI, GIVE ME BACK MY MASK BEFORE I POUND YOUR SKINNY ASS!" Kakuzu shouted, making the redhead scurry to his feet.

However it was too late. Kakuzu grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him back. Sasori gulped and offered the mask. The elder snatched it and then landed a punch to his stomach before releasing him.

"Hey, Kakuzu, chill." Kisame was shocked at the outburst.

"Shut the fuck up, shark bait." He seethed, turning around.

"Kakuzu." Hidan was surprised to find the scars on Kakuzu's cheeks. "Sit down. I'll take care of these little shits."

"I don't need your fucking help." Hidan felt a vain pop and he picked up an eraser, chucking it at Kakuzu's head. "What the fuck?"

"When I tell you to do something, you do it, fucker." He snapped

Kakuzu grumbled under his breath, quickly putting the mask back over his face. He took his seat and watched Hidan lead the pair out of the classroom. Sasori was still clutching his stomach. Hidan lead them up the stairs and headed in the direction of the nurse's office. However, Sasori protested. So, Hidan instead took them to the large art classroom.

"Katsu." Hidan snapped at the blond sculptor, startling him into smashing his clay work. "Take care of your student." He shoved the redhead towards the blond. "He's lucky he only got a punch to the gut."

"What the heck happened, hm?" Deidara gasped, looking at the grumbling redhead.

"The new kid freaked out." He shrugged. "Punched me in the gut."

"You took his mask." Hidan glowered. "Without permission. Served you right, little prick."

"Actually... I took it first..." Kisame murmured.

"Yeah, but I can't punish you since that little weasel would probably ensure I ended up in the news or worse." He shrugged.

"Itachi isn't scary..." Kisame pouted.

"You just think that's 'cause you two are fuck buddies." He scoffed. "I gotta get back to my class. Zetsu didn't show."

He stormed back to his class to find Kakuzu burying his face in the text book. Hidan decided to let him cool off and wrote the day's assignment on the board. Once the students got out their textbooks he sat in the desk next to Kakuzu's.

"What do you want?" Kakuzu growled.

"Yeesh, just wanted to ask how you got those stitches."

"None of your business." He snapped his pencil.

"Oh come on, Kuzu-chan. Pretty please with a cherry on top?" Kakuzu's eyes went wide, a blush dusting his face.

"N-No..." Hidan smirked at Kakuzu's reaction.

"Why not, Kuzu?" He purred in the boy's ear.

"I-It's... not any... of your... business." He struggled, feeling a lovely shiver go down his spine.

"I think you are my business, Kuzu."

He poked his cheek, taking satisfaction in how Kakuzu had to grip the sides of his desk. He stood, smirking, and drifted back over to his desk. He kept his eyes on Kakuzu up until the bell rang, startling him. He did not realize it had been fixed. The students all got up, save Kakuzu. Curious, Hidan returned to his side. His head was buried in an arm, the other one under the desk.

"Kakuzu?" Hidan nudged his shoulder.

"Fuck off." He snapped, sitting up abruptly.

"I think you're the one fucking off." He laughed.

"Am not." His blush was back.

"I think you are."

He went to the door, locking it after putting a sign on the outside. He strode back over to his student's desk, pulling down the mask. Kakuzu jumped, about to stop him. However he got caught in his magenta eyes again. Hidan placed his lips on Kakuzu's startling him.

"M-Mr. Fukyuu." He stuttered.

"Hidan." He corrected, grabbing his hand. "And you were jerking off, little shit."

"What do you expect? The way you were speaking was—mph?" Hidan cut him off with another kiss, bringing the tan hand to a bulge in his pants.

"The thought of you getting hard... just from the sound of my voice..." He purred. "Was a damned sexy one."

"I'm not... ready for this." Kakuzu protested, jerking back.

"Come on, just a hand job... I'll blow you." He pulled him away from the desk and over to his chair, forcing him to sit. "An eye for an eye."

He pulled the organ from his unzipped pants and looked up at its owner. Kakuzu was feeling really heated, his teacher's magenta eyes being the cause again. Hidan did not leave those green eyes as he began to take in his tip. He began to close his eyes as he let it slide in further. Kakuzu inhaled sharply at the feel. It was odd yet it felt so good.

"Hidan-sensei..." He swallowed, placing his hand on the gray hair.

"Hnds uff da hur itch." Hidan growled, creating an even better sensation. His words were ignored as Kakuzu tugged on his hair, earning another growl.

"Heh. Sorry, but it feels good." He sneered.

"Hmph." He pulled back a bit, licking the head. "I hate when people fuck with my hair and you're no exception, shithead."

"Ah..." He moaned, "You-Yer not... doing anything that says you hate it."

Hidan scowled and held him up in order to get his tongue to the scrotum. Kakuzu moaned again but did not tug his hair again. He leaned back, feeling close. A moment later, Hidan had him fully enveloped again, getting him to come in his mouth. He pulled off now, swallowing the load and licking him lips. He grabbed a tissue from his desk and wiped his mouth then Kakuzu's limp member. Then he stood up and unzipped his pants.

"Hurry it up. I blew you so now you have to fucking pay." He demanded, sitting on his own desk.

"I didn't ask you to." He huffed, placing his hand inside the teacher's boxers.

He scoot the chair close to the desk and placed his other hand on Hidan's inner thigh. It was rather difficult for Kakuzu to jack another off when he was still wearing pants. He wondered if he would be willing to take his pants off. As if he read his mind, Hidan grabbed both of his wrists in one and and then easily slid his pants off with the other.

"Better?" He smirked, going back on the desk.

Kakuzu nodded, pulling at the other male's manhood. He ran his hand along his inner thighs every now and then too. It was probably the same size as his, give or take. He continued to fondle him until instructed for more. Kakuzu rolled his eyes and tugged painfully. He was not expecting the moan. Hidan... was a masochist.

"I-If you tell anyone, I'll kill you..." He panted.

"Hm."

Kakuzu replied, going at a faster pace now. He wondered, briefly, why the bell had not yet rang. He shoved the thought to the back of his mind, focusing on Hidan as he became more verbal. He was shouting his god's name. He even heard his own name a few times. He looked up at Hidan just as he gave a spasm. Nails dug into his shoulders and white spurted onto his face. He blinked several times, his mouth open in surprise.

"Sorry. I'm not good at warning others." He laughed, grabbing another tissue. "You should get to class."

"Wait. About my stitches..." Kakuzu placed a hand over them.

"I think they look hot on you." Hidan shrugged. "... You look tired..."

"A little..." He nodded. "But... I got them in a car accident when I was seventeen. It killed my parents."

"I see... Well, Kuzu, you know where a bed is. The door's unlocked." Hidan grabbed his key, unlocking the classroom door for him. "I'll wake you up before Uchiha's class."

Kakuzu nodded and grabbed his stuff before heading to the room across the hall. He ignored the students waiting to get into Hidan's class on the steps but they did not ignore him. He made sure to slam the bloody door behind him and lock it once inside. He dropped his stuff then plopped on the bed. Today's class had _not_ gone as expected... it had gone better.

–

Hidan went to wake Kakuzu up, as promised, before Itachi's class. Before waking, he hovered near the bed, admiring his sleeping face. He smirked, moving his long brown hair aside. He leaned in, kissing him on the lips, efficiently waking him. Kakuzu woke with a start but soon settled, looping his arms around his neck to deepen the kiss.

Hidan smirked, slipping his hands under Kakuzu's trench coat and shirt. Kakuzu shied away, much to Hidan's disappointment. However he was not deterred. Kakuzu had rolled away from him, closer to the middle of the bed. He straddled his hips, smirking down at his flustered student.

"What's wrong, Kuzu-chan?" He purred, nuzzling him. "You a virgin?"

"W-What?" Kakuzu squirmed. "I-I'm not ready."

"Kuzu-chan." Hidan whined.

"... You're acting like an uke." Kakuzu smirked, making Hidan's small fall fast.

"Oh fuck no. I am not being uke." Hidan glowered. "I'm older than you."

"I'm bigger than you." Kakuzu shot back.

"We'll alternate. I fuck you now, you fuck me later."

"Compromise?" Kakuzu sneered. "Not something a seme would do."

"Fucking fine. I'll just force you down, shithead." Hidan snapped, unzipping and unbuttoning his pants.

"Wha—that's rape, bitch!" He squirmed again but it only helped Hidan pull his pants off completely.

"Not if you like it, bitch." He smirked, looking at the other male's erection.

Kakuzu blushed, unable to think of a comeback in such a state. He breathed heavily as Hidan sat up, unbuttoning his shirt more—he usually wore it with the top three unbuttoned. He forced Kakuzu's coat off but, since his shirt had to be pulled up, he was having difficulty completely stripping him. So, he reached over to a bedside table, digging into one of the drawers. Kakuzu started when he saw it was a knife, squirming.

"Oi you little shit, stay still or it'll slip." Hidan growled, holding him down.

"I am really, _really_ beginning to question this school's rules!" Kakuzu grumbled, submitting for fear of his life.

"Meh. It's the only one that would let me within state lines." He grinned maniacally, shredding Kakuzu's shirt.

"Gah! Do you have any idea how much that cost?" He exclaimed. "I would've taken it off if you asked."

"Nah, I like your reactions when I do this more." He ground down on Kakuzu's erection, letting him feel his own.

Kakuzu scowled but did not move when Hidan scooted down in order to take off his pants and boxers. He moaned with Hidan when he rubbed their groins together. Their kiss was sloppy and Kakuzu had submitted further at the zealot's touches. His skin and hands were so much colder than his own. Hidan licked and kissed down Kakuzu's scarred torso, admiring the lacerations on the way

His fingers brushed his pelvis lightly and he looked up at his student's green eyes. He stroked the length, making Kakuzu's breath hitch and his body heat up and squirm in pleasure. Hidan brought their members together, squatting close as he held them in one hand, rubbing them both together within that pale hand. His other free hand snaked up to Kakuzu's thin lips, fingers tracing them before being allowed in the moist cavern.

He had, back at his old school, a single friend. She was, naturally a yaoi fan and was constantly forcing him to read them all; every little detail. So he knew what to do with those fingers. He sucked and licked the pale fingers while tan ones ran down Hidan's back. Hidan could barely take the sight and pulled his fingers out, trailing down to his hole. Kakuzu inhaled sharply, shuddering as the index fingertip massaged him.

Hidan leaned back up, entering the digit as his tongue danced with Kakuzu's. He could see Kakuzu was discomforted by the feel but pushed in his middle finger. Kakuzu gasped and Hidan used his other hand to play with the long brown hair, trying to distract him from another finger.

"Shit..."

"Shut the fuck up." Hidan huffed, poking and prodding now. "It's too late to chicken out. We're both horny as hell."

"Ah!" Kakuzu jumped a bit, making Hidan grin and repeat his last motion. "Hurry up and stick it in..."

"Hm?" He smirked. "Impatient, Kuzu-chan?" He chuckled. "So am I."

He made Kakuzu roll over and get on his knees and forearms. Kakuzu tried to relax as he felt Hidan position himself. He inched forward, hands holding onto Kakuzu's hips. He eased himself in, surprised at how good it felt. Kakuzu, on the other hand, just wanted it over with. Hidan had completely entered him, leaning down to kiss his cheek.

"You ready?"

"You care?" He retorted bitterly.

"... I'm sorry..." Hidan frowned.

"Don't be, just hurry it up." He griped.

Hidan rolled his eyes, grumbling under his breath as he pulled out a little. He thrust back in without warning, making Kakuzu moan. Hidan smirked at this, wrapping his hand around Kakuzu's length. He pulled back and then slammed in once more, tugging on Kakuzu as he did so. He continued to thrust, starting a rhythm and changing angles. He was waiting for his new uke to finally become verbal. After a few times, he hit his mark.

"Holy-"

"Say Jashin, bitch." Hidan hissed.

"Fuck no-ow!" Kakuzu winced as Hidan sunk his teeth into his shoulder. "Hi-Hidan-sensei..."

"Tch... if you weren't so fucking hot saying that, you'd be fodder for my lord."

"If you weren't so sexy, I'd be kicking your ass... I just might too, fucking masochistic bitch."

Hidan sneered at his lover, going faster and harder. He felt himself getting close. However he decided Kakuzu had to 'come' before himself. He hit Kakuzu's prostate, and then he felt him tighten. Kakuzu cried out, spurting his essence on Hidan's pale hand and bedsheets. Hidan drew out a moan as he too reached the edge.

"Ah... is that all?" Kakuzu panted as he felt Hidan slowly pull out, leaving his load behind.

"Fucker... are you trying to piss me off?"

"I thought I was the fucked." He retorted smartly.

Hidan scowled, smacking the side of his head before pulling them to lay on the bed. He held Kakuzu close and whispered three words in his ear. Kakuzu returned them.

– Elsewhere...

Kisame and Sasori frowned, wondering where their friend had gone. He had missing throughout the entire seventh period and it was now time for lunch. Itachi lead the duo into the cafeteria, explaining that the teacher's lounge was occupied. Deidara waved them over eagerly, hugging Sasori when he approached. He had already got food out on the table.

"Hidan came over last night and helped me make these, hm. He was in a pretty good mood." He frowned. "But this morning he was pissed."

"Hn?"

"Kisame and Sasori were messing around with the new kid, hm."

"Hn..." Itachi frowned in confusion.

"Hey fuckers." Hidan had arrived. "Hoshigaki... what's wrong? Don't like my fucking cooking?"

"Er. No, I just got here." Kisame replied, grabbing a biscuit. "Hey Kakuzu!"

"Shut the fuck up or I'm going to kill your ass." He grumbled moodily.

"Oh come now, Kuzu-chan. Lighten up."

"Just for that, _Hidan_, I am going to kill your ass too." He growled.

"Looking forward to it." He replied with a maniacal grin.

"Uh... Kakuzu... did you just say '**Hidan'**?" Zetsu arrived, startling the group.

"Yes and if I ever hear it coming from your mouth again, I'm going to get the weed-killer." He growled possessively.

"... So you and Fukyuu..."

"Fukyuu fucked you..." Sasori laughed with the others.

* * *

Ha! A oneshot. You hear me? O-N-E-S-H-O-T. ONEshot. NOT CONTINUING THIS. … Not even a chapter for Kakuzu to get his chance at topping. I have other stories for that.

I plan on working on a KisaIta oneshot next. Just for the three day weekend.

Granted, this was a rather LONG oneshot... it's as close as I can get to a oneshot with my desires to never stop... I'm taking a break from those kinds of stories. Although Growing Up has an ending planned, my KakuHida MPreg... does not.

*cries in a corner* Why can't I write short stories~?


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